Surviving Jakarta 101: Gastronomy

Since I think that I shall be productive tonight, I wanna post more stuffs to this blog.

*throwing a random hand sign to make me look like a cool Asian*

Common FAQ:

Q: Do Asians eat rice everyday?
A: Yes, ma'am. We eat rice everyday. That's the evidence. Rice+chicken+tofu+some stir fried veggies
FYI, Spanish rice is different from Jasmine or other Asian variety o rice.

Please consult our representative for more info about this product: http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Asian_rice

Q: What are these golden stuffs?
A: It is called Durian. A legendary spiked fruit which is unable to be taken to most public places - in Thailand: motel+hotel for instance, in Singapore: MRT- because of its ridiculously-super saiyan strong-odor. Most Asians like it. It is a dangerous being if you eat it while sipping beer, for real, you can die. (especially since some Asian beers are better than *cough* beers)
There are several varieties of it. There are some good stuffs from Medan, Indonesia or from Thailand. All I know is that they are ridiculously expensive, taste like liquor, make you drowsy and pretty easily obtained.

For more info of this product, please kindly consult our company's representative: http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Durian

Q: Do Asians have legal drinking age?
A: Yes, ma'am. Actually we do, but nobody cares. (It's 21 just as US of A)

Q: Is that Dragon roll?
A: Yes ma'am. It's dragon roll and it's even better than what you imagined. It consists of avocado, rice, something else and unagi - eel.Oh Sushi Tei, if only your price is reasonable...

Q: What is makimono/makizushi?
A: It is something good and cheaper than cool rolls such as Dragon rolls or Volcano rolls. I hope it helps you to be inquisitive and thus rendering you weaken to the greatness of makimono.

Q: What kind of blasphemy is this?
A: Oh, it's just a roll that everybody get when they go to Sushi Tei in their birthday week.

Q: Why do you eat rice...with some weird looking red meat?
A: Mind your own business, ma'am. You're one talkative inquisitive being. That's Nasi Campur - literally means Mixed Rice. Yeah, awkward. That's Nasi Hainam - Hainam Rice, pretty different with usual rice. There are some veggies - sour, FYI- roasted pork, sweetened red pork and half-an-egg. It tastes so freakin good that I wanna eat it once a week, well not really.

Q: What in the earth are you eating? Dirt?
A: That's gado-gado. I guess it's a food originally from Jakarta. A mixture of lontong - cylinder shaped rice, cut into slices, tempe - some good stuffs you hardly able to buy in US of A and other veggies - boiled kangkung / bayam-spinach or stuffs.

Please kindly contact our representative to know more about this product: http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Gado_gado

Q: Why did you post two pictures of this gado-gado?
A: Oh, it's our company's policy. We want to make sure that you're able to see the stuffs in that plate. Oh and anyway, that 's Gado-gado Cemara: it's pretty good and famous among Jakarta old folks.