short sudden late night mental invasion


"Michelle is valuable to God. God loves Michelle no matter what. Michelle's wroth is not dependent on Michelle's performance or on what others think of Michelle. Michelle worth is found in the loving eyes of God. If Michelle wins, God loves Michelle. If Michelle loses, God loves Michelle. If Michelle is sinful and selfish, God loves Michelle. He is a covenant God and this love never changes. Michelle is valuable, precious and worth dying for just as she is."


Mom told me several days ago, right before I went to sleep:
"Study hard. Be the best. I always wish for your success."

And I couldn't sleep easily that night. My mind worked hard; it worked just as hard as when I was doing my research paper. If I made an analogy to the car's gear, it's freaking in the fifth gear.

"Being in the top, then what?"
"Being success, then what?"
"Getting straight A, then what?"

Does God care about that?
God does not care if I got 101 or 45 in my music classes' exam. 
God cares, tho', if I got that score from cheating.

Does God care if I'm rich?
Well, he does care.
But, does being rich, really worth it?
Isn't being rich means it is harder to get into heaven?
Aren't rich people focus their mind more towards earthly thing?

Shouldn't our goals...be the things above?

What is being success anyway?
Shall it be a starting point to do good stuffs to others?
I do not need lots lots lots of money to start doing good stuffs to people.
I do not need straight A to start doing good stuffs to people!
I am able to wake up early in the morning, just to serve others through preparing breakfast for them.
Isn't that worth more than getting straight A?
Isn't that worth more than being successful?

In our world of competitiveness, we just often forget.
We just forget that things that really matter...are the things above.

God loves me unconditionally.
He loves me, no matter what grades I make this semester.
He loves me, even if I play miserably in my honors recital tomorrow.
He loves me, even if I am sarcastic to people.

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Meet The Author

Michelle Josephine Sulaiman
19, almost 20.
Stranded in Abilene, TX after a long flight from Jakarta, ID.
9723.78 miles.
Ad veritatem per caritatem '11.