Awkward

This is how scary adaptation can be.

Sitting on your dorm bed seems to be so natural now. It may be awkward when I lay on my own bed back home.

Talking in English is something that I regard as the scariest thing in my adaptation. Isn't it scary that I find out know that...my dreams seem to be in English and not my own native language now? Well, it seems so...I guess so...

But, adaptation is really scary.
More and more days, I feel happy with my American friends. *oh please read, I have no Indonesian friend here. NO. ONE.*
I feel that this is awkward...I do not even understand their childhood life...how they grew up with Barney and not Doraemon, and I completely do not understand about it, soooo it's strange.
Doraemon is something that I will consider as SWAG: Something We Asians Get.
It is awkward that they are strangers...they have different skin colors, backgrounds, religion denominations, everything...yet they are my family.

I do not know anything, anything? yes, anything about how they grew up, about their favorite snacks, about their favorite cursing words, about their favorite tv shows. I love them for no reason...but I know I love them truly from the bottom of my heart.
They are strangers to my past...and they may remain as strangers as time being...but they are not strangers to my future nor my heart.

Anywaaaay, so yeah. It is awkward. How I do not need to translate my language into English inside my mind before talking to people. It is so awkward to know that my mind is thinking in English instead of my own language.

It is awkward that I enjoy hugging people a lot now. Yes. Hugging.
Praising people as a custom and not really mean it? Yes. Thank you Americans for americanized me on this thing. Now that I think about it, I don't really like it; Well, I lie to people :/
Oh and now I feel awkward to talk in my own language. Yes. Awkward
And I enjoy saying awkward. Yes. Awkward. This feels awkward.
It is so awkward.

And days more days, I know I will feel more awkward knowing about how adaptive humans can be.

ps. How many times do I type awkward? 12. haha. oh 13 with the title.